Stay Tuned!

It’s over a decade; pink ponytails and hoop skirts stole my heart.
Was on the Dreamcast, but the UK didn’t get the second part.
Unfair to me, it came out in the rest of Europe, damn it!
What’s this I see? Eight years later it’s out on Xbox Live,
What an effing surprise.

Cause this is Spaaaace, Space Channel  5,
It’s also ‘Part Two’ but, the chorus will sound bad otherwise.
You know it’s Spaaaace, Space Channel  5,
You want to swan dive into the, best, night of, your life.

You play Ulala, sexy reporter could be on page 3 of The Sun,
A dude called Purge and, the Rhythm Rouge are your new evil scum.
You close your eyes, the space president has just been taken hostage,
And all the while, he is forced to dance to a cheesy rhyme.
Rhythm action time.

Cause this is Spaaaace, Space Channel  5,
There ain’t no questions asked when Space Michaels on your side, girl.
Spaaaace, Space Channel  5,
Your dancing for life inside the, headquarters, that’s SC 5.

Expo boys drooling, in cosplay I walk down the masquerade,
There’s no escaping free hugs from cosplay kids this time.
(Arms open wide)
Ulala can ruin my life.

You’re need to chu chu chu, there’s bad guys making everybody jive,
They will possess you, up down up down left right just to survive.
Now is the time, for your swinging report show to come together, yeah,
Groove through the night, Space Michael, Pudding and Officer Pine.
All should be fine!

Cause this is Spaaaace, Space Channel  5,
So Deee-lite tried to sue, but then you kicked that bitch’s ass too.
Spaaaace, Space Channel  5,
Ulala will win the fight and share a,
Glimmer, Morolian critter, shimmer, here tonight.

Cause this is Spaaaace, Space Channel  5,
If you haven’t played the first game, you need to do so straight away yeh.
Spaaaace, Space Channel  5,
Don’t make me break your legs, so go and, play the, game, oow!

(…Play Space Channel 5)
Dancing falls across the space,
There is evil again Ulala must face.
Space Channel  5 Part 2 is tough I admit,
It shouldn’t put you off, because the game is ‘the sh*t’.

And if anyone is lame,
And starts bad mouthing this awesome game.
They must stand and face a crazy Fran,
And her evil space minion clan.

Gunna wear jet packs tonight, ooh baby!
Gunna wear headphones tonight, ooh darling!
Space Channel 5 baby, ooh!

Cameos in rubbish games are just not fair,
Sports and kart racing just mess up her pink hair.
And everyone can see up her tiny hoop skirt,
But at least she know her ass is pert.

And so this ends my swinging song,
And I really hope Sega doesn’t prolong.
For no space cat can resist,
The quote  ‘stay tuned’ or the threat of my clenched fist…