Digital Dilemma – Leon’s Worries

Dear Jo,

My name is Leon Kennedy. You may know me as the protagonist from such games as Resident Evil 2 and Resident Evil 4. Now, as you know, these are the most popular titles in the franchise and I can’t help but feel that it’s down to me, somehow. Maybe it’s my floppy hair… maybe it’s the fact that good games come in even numbers, I don’t know, all I know is that the games I star in are awesome, and that generally makes me awesome as well. In the first game I tried to be modest, playing the rookie cop who was willing to overlook what everyone else would have ever done (get the hell out of town) and instead made Claire go and look for survivors, while I hung around and fawned over Ada.

Yes, I tried that strategy, but in the end the fame just got to my head and for my return, I basically showed off. I willingly went off alone into an unknown environment (knowing that I would be safe because I can dodge lasers now) and rescued a damsel in distress from what I counted to be about 5,000 separate monsters. I even went in armed with just a basic level pistol, trusting that there would be plenty of unwatched ammo scattered about and also that a strange middle aged man with his face covered would be interested in dealing in weapons with me. Of course I premeditated that I would be paying in stolen swag that I had voluntarily picked up along the way, because when I’m not busy being the star of a survivor horror game, I am a petty thief.

The thing is, though, is that I’m worried. My next game looks amazing. It has all of the positive credentials: it has an even number in it, and it has me in it, but I don’t know… if this turns out to be a huge flop, then that’s the end of my streak. This has never happened before, and it scares me. I’ve got all of my hopes riding on this… I’ve even kept my haircut exactly the same, even though it was at least 10 years out of date in Resident Evil 4. Good luck charm, and all that. My question to you is what do I do if the game does do badly and my name is tarnished with ‘that guy who was in all of the good Resident Evils until the last one which was crap’?

Dear Leon,

I understand your concerns. You should definitely keep the hair as that’s how we know who you are. The furry coat in Resident Evil 4 was a bad idea, though. I can’t imagine that it was cold enough to need a coat of that thickness. You did get rid of it early on though, so you are partly forgiven. What I would do if I were you and Resident Evil 6 went down badly is blame Chris. I know, it’s mean, but he was there first so has more of a reputation than you even though he made the mistake of starring in the odd numbered games. It’s not all bad, though. Though neither of you were in it, the third one was all right. Chris’ main setback is that he ultimately decided to go with strength instead of agility and so where you boast the ability to dodge lasers and roundhouse kick unfortunate souls to the face, Chris’ main claim to anything is that he can punch rocks. Seriously – if the game does well, bask in glory. If it does not, blame Chris.

Regards!

Jo