Cheap Shots

Frowned upon by many an online shooter gamer with disgust is the easy, kill. Spawn killing, kill stealing, shooting in the back and the most terrible sin of all, slaughtering a person who’s obviously away from the game what with their character being motionless just begging for even the lamest sniper’s half-arsed headshot. Slated and hurled abuse at by the unsuspecting victims are those awful, awful people who go for cheap shot kills instead of precision aiming. Shame on them!!!!!

Ok, ok, I’m off one, preaching a fake sermon with a Gordon Brownish voice-over in my head (scary!). Honestly though I think maybe once or twice in my whole online gaming life I truthfully admit to NOT taking the cheap kill. I have seen one time, an enemy spawn in a corner and actually ran past feeling the urge to slay but not wishing to be unfair to the player. But, that was a moment of cocky “I got this match won” smugness that has not since been repeated.

For anyone who doesn’t play Halo 3 the absolute most kick in the teeth way to fall at the hands of the opposition is a shotgun blast to the face from and invisible assassin. AAAAAARRRRRRRRRGH! little @*S%ยฃ/s There’s no doubt that the the Shotty/Camo combination can give you a tidy lead in a relatively short amount of time.

If you find them they will die.

I often find myself busy-bodily pointing out on the “You stole my kill” types of comment, whether directed at myself or a teammate that there is no kill stealing in team, it’s called assisting! ๐Ÿ™‚

There’s no I in team, just ME

Although winning isn’t everything there is really no fun in every battle oriented encounter resulting in a loss. It’s a scientific fact that winning at anything is an important survival skill that rewards us both physically and mentally and just plain feels good. Racking up satisfying kills quickly is the buzz that keeps my paying my LIVE subscription.

I wonder if those vocal victims of a less than strived for kill are actually any more honourable than those they are moaning at or just big baby sore losers, to whom I respectfully and maturely say NA NA NA NA NAAA!!!!







6 responses to “Cheap Shots”

  1. Michael avatar

    I have been guilty of this, though usually only as a way to end the match because everyone but the absent player is dead. I really, really, REALLY hate people whinging about a kill being stolen in a team game! Especially if there’s more enemies left alive and, more often than not, quite nearby. Though if people say “That’s my kill” beforehand, I’ll happily stand aside and watch their back.

    It could be worse, it could be Brian Blessed’s voice doing that sermon…

  2. Shaz avatar

    As soon as one voice starts screeching, “you stole my kill!” I start laughing and doing a touchy “oooooooooooooh”.

    I’ve seen many of this happen in Gears of War and people ordering kills here and there, only to get killed themselves. As they say in Worms, “STOOPID!”

    Meh, I’ll kill who/when I like. If kids get pushy, don’t expect me to listen to them. Their anger only entertains me. ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. Chris avatar

    I find kill stealing can be alittle frustrating, especially when you have danced a bloody dance of death around someone in a fit of furious battle like in Gears of War, and each of you are redder than a red-thing. All it takes is one shot to finish the duel and someone takes your thunder. Makes it all the worse if you’ve hacked your way through hell and ‘deserve’ the kill. But in all fairness, when I play clan matches it’s anyone’s kill to get the team-result. I’m not-so-hot at Halo and any kill I get is a cherished one! ๐Ÿ˜‰

  4. Dave avatar

    An early example of this crap is Streets of Rage 2. In two player there was nothing worse than your partner taking the last chicken or apple when they had a full health bar and you were hanging on by a threat – cheers mate!

    Same thing happened to me last night playing Commando 3 on XBox Live with a random guy. He had full health and I was trailing yet he kept on taking all the health packs – arse!

  5. Laura avatar

    Yeah Dave That’s just so mean :)that’s not even helping a final score or anything!

    There’s nothing worse on co-op’s than playing with someone who doesn’t even offer you weapons and ammo and just hogs it all.

  6. Martin avatar

    The best taking a kill ever was at the very end of Double Dragon. If you were unaware you could get your friend to beat up the boss, then when they were basking in the afterglow you beat the crap out of them and finish the game. Me and a friend nearly re-enacted the game in an arcade when I did that to him!

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