Sex. We all want it. Whether we’ve got it or not, we all want more of it. Luckily for us, as the average age of gamers is constantly on the rise a similar rise is occurring in X-rated content, or at least the suggestion of it. I welcome it. It’s not demeaning or empowering, it’s just hot. Welcome to the kinky corner of Ready Up. Here we can relish in the naked form, both male and female, and what better person to guide you than me. Zoey at your service, your resident sexpert both in and out of the virtual world. Sure, I love the occasional kid’s game, but there’s nothing like an injection of sex appeal to make a game more intriguing. Let’s face it, whether you admit it or not, sex sells. The way I see it, if I’m going to be sold something I’d rather it was from a bikini-clad sex-bomb than a blimp in a t-shirt. Even before we open that crisp layer of cellophane to get into our possibly raunchy new game, there’s sex. Hell, the girl on the left could convince me to think about rebuying a PS3, at least for long enough to get her phone number!
So, what games are out there for those wanting a truly ‘adult’ game? Well, in this blog I thought I’d introduce you to the most blatantly sexual sim game out there – The Virtual Encyclopedia of Sex. Whilst officially a ‘learning’ game for all those with dreams of Casanova-like skills, this game allows you to design your people right down to genitalia and piercings. Once created your job is to experiment with different partners and positions in order to fuck well enough that you should be given a medal. Reverse cowgirl, missionary or something a bit more exciting, it’s all in here with the ability to fondle various things as you see fit. So basically, this is a porn sim? I hear you ask. Well, yes, but they do give you handy hints on how to improve as you go.
It’s essentially a sim game crossed with boobs. What’s not to like? By mastering basic foreplay and positions whilst being given tips on how to make the couple orgasm, you can unlock more complicated positions. Play enough of it and you may soon be wondering why your real life girlfriend doesn’t seem to bend that way. But hey, not every woman’s that flexible (for the record, I’m made of elastic). Whilst highly entertaining and ‘educational’ this sure as hell isn’t going to be fun for all the family as this ‘learning’ game could terrify those both young and old. However, hours of fun could be had with this, if only to be told consistently that you’re a stud in bed. How many video games can do that? You may think your Commander Shepard is the hottest thing in the galaxy, but some ego stroking never hurt anyone. Even the most confident of us in real life would like an unbiased grade, surely. So what are you waiting for? Sure it’s a bit more full on fucking than some of the sex sequences in other games, but after years of people making naked skins for The Sims characters and making all sorts of sex toys in Second Life it’s clear that there is a big audience for this sort of game. Maybe when a Kinect version comes out it can be to your sex life what YourShape is to the perfect beach body. Multiplayer could really be a help for long distance relationships…
Join me next time as we continue our journey into the world where sex and videogames collide And remember: it’s not demeaning or empowering, it’s just hot.
| Kinky Character #001: Bayonetta |
 |
|
Kinky Facts: Despite a wardrobe filled with outfits for every sexual fantasy, Bayonetta’s default outfit is still a favourite. Whilst looking like durable PVC, it is actually made of her own hair, meaning our feisty witch is essentially running around in the nude. Add to this a sexy accent and the fact that we all know she’s a bad, bad girl and this is definitely the character we should all be fantasizing about.
If that’s still not enough for you then start watching her lollipop action when she indulges her sweet tooth! This is one woman who loves to give head. |
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.