Press SeX to Continue – The Sims (NSFW)

Welcome to the kinky corner of Ready Up. Here we can relish in the naked form, both male and female, and what better person to guide you than me. Zoey at your service, your resident sexpert both in and out of the virtual world. The Sims is the best selling franchise in PC history, mainly because of it’s wide appeal. Gamers played it, non-gamers played it, kids, women, older folk, the recently dead, everyone… but while Maxis did their best to make it family friendly, those with too much time on their hands were busy modding to undo all their hard work.

Whilst Maxis were well aware that a life sim couldn’t very well be completely PG they did name sex “woohoo” and make sure that conveniently placed blurring stopped any enjoyment of your Sims showering, etc. By far the naughtiest object contained in the game and its many many sequels is the Vibromatic Heart bed – a double bed that you can switch to vibrate before you do the deed. It’s hardly smutty enough for our purposes, but at least it’s a start. Luckily the easy to mod objects and skins mean you can literally make anything to import in to your game, if only you put your mind to it. A “nude patch” that removes any blurring when naked is generally the first thing that any adult gamer is going to want to download. It adds a touch of realism and starts to make the game a little naughtier.

Once that’s been done you’ll need to download or make some new skins with whatever tattoos, piercings, degrees of hair and genitals you find most appealing. A shocking amount of these are already available so chances are you won’t have to look far. Then we get to the fun bits. Whilst nudity is a perfectly adequate choice for many activities in life there are the odd occasions when you want to look your best. There are huge wardrobes out there for your Sim, and you’ll find a plethora of underwear choices from the sexy to the just plain wrong. Find whatever works for you and set it to whatever outfit you want. Want to go to a party in underwear but go nude to work? No problem. By simply downloading a few things you can show off as much as you want, wherever you want.

99% of objects in the Sims are as sexy as a dishcloth, (unless you have a household furniture fetish, in which case may I recommend a job in DFS) there are two routes to go down when modding. Either take an existing object and re-purpose it, such as this chair with added animations:

…or build an object from scratch with whatever requirements you need. Obviously this takes a lot more effort if you have to make it yourself as animating successfully sexy things can be challenging. However, once you’ve loaded your game with dozens of objects to fulfill your sexual whims and desires you can really go nuts. Try holding a swingers party, an orgy or get creative:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RHWJSCRBSa4[/youtube]

Join me next time as we continue our journey into the world where sex and video games collide. And remember: it’s not demeaning or empowering, it’s just hot.