Sick to Death of FPS

Bioshock
Halo.
Don’t even get me started on The Orange Box.
Condemned
F.E.A.R.
Hell, even Call of Duty

I doubt anyone would argue their relevance in the history of next generation games. Whether it’s saving Planet Earth from a hostile alien takeover, submerging to the bottom of the sea to battle Big Daddies or destroying an opposing team with a rocket launcher up the booty; there are hours of fun and mayhem to be had with them, unfortunately just not for us all.

These titles are among the growing number out there that I like to label – unplayable. Not for lack of content, poor quality graphics or impossible controls; but for the simple fact that my brain can’t handle their first person perspective without telling my stomach to toss my cookies.

Yes my fellow gamers, I suffer with motion sickness; to a point of embarrassment when it comes to games.

In recent months there have been quite a few blogs talking about the role of the achievement score, or many a rave (and rant) about some of the above mentioned games; and every time there is I feel more than my fair share of anger and annoyance at the fact I cannot physically play so many titles without the need for a sick bucket.

Having enjoyed many a side-scrolling platformer in my youth, and having more than a few hours worth of RPG racked up on my PS2, my aversion to first person perspectives only truly began to show itself a few years ago, during a gaming (and drooling) session with the then new Xbox 360 and specifically a title called Prey. Now I know I’m not alone with that one, as its upside down antigravity malarkey made more than a few feel their stomach churn. Unfortunately it wasn’t the first, and undoubtedly won’t be the last to have an effect on me.

As many of my fellow gaming girlies have and will discuss, when it comes to being a bird in what is so obviously seen as a bloke’s world, there is always a burning desire to hold your own. So what happens if you’re like me and you can’t actually attempt to play so many titles and earn your gold star from the gaming boys? I wouldn’t be as annoyed if it wasn’t for these pesky achievements you see. Before now, not having played the latest game was an easy brush off as no one could really keep track or score.

Recently I had a new add to my Xbox Live friends list, who took a keen interest in scouring my game history and no doubt summing up my worth as a gamer by what I had played and achieved. It wasn’t until he started reeling off “Have you not played this? I can’t believe you haven’t tried that!” with such an air of shock and surprise, like many of them were gaming rites of passage, that I realised just how damn annoying my affliction is, how much I’ve be missing out on and just how dented my gaming experience could be in the future.

I’m quite proud that I managed to get myself through Halo 2 and 3 by playing 15-20 minutes at a time, or getting myself killed off frequently in online matches so I could gulp cold water in spawn time. I’ve also found a way to partially enjoy many first person perspective games by the other half playing while I watch out of the corner of my eye, but that’s no way to really get your teeth stuck into a game, especially the iconic ones!

Thankfully not all games tend to have this effect on me, for some reason I can manage to get myself through Left 4 Dead for a good few hours, which leads me to believe it’s as much about the way the character moves as the view, but that’s really a discussion for someone more technically minded about programming and the human body than me.

From what Wikipedia tells me it’s all down to a conflict where my brain can’t understand why my eyes think I’m moving when I’m actually on my bed with a controller… I guess some gamers just have all the luck!