Warning! This game contains traps that may make you cry~ The developer accepts no responsibility for smashed keyboards! Xtal Swore and Nyu Media Ltd assume no responsibility for any damage, injury, malfunction, rage or mental trauma caused by playing this game. You have been warned.
When a game’s ‘manual’ has this disclaimer and when its website is covered with similar warnings, it just makes you laugh and want to play it. Can’t be that bad, right?
Eryi is a cute little green-haired girl trying to get her stolen melon back. This involves running cheerfully through colourful environments full of beautiful scenery, pretty flowers… oh and death traps that spring out of nowhere. At the very start, move to the right unawares and you get hit with a metal pan dropping from the sky. One life gone. In the first stage, move a few steps and get hit by a trap that pops out of the grass. Another life gone. Move a little further, hit some blocks (because Mario taught you to) and an enemy will pop out of one and drop straight onto your head. Another life gone. By this point, you’ll be in the minus numbers of lives since the game starts you off with only 2 and that’s easily at least 4 deaths in the first minute or so. But the save flag is just over there…
A silly little platform game, Eryi’s Action has so many surprise traps that it’s pretty much unfair. Tell it that though, and it’ll just giggle a little and go, Oh, you! You only have to complete the stages by moving forward and avoiding traps but there are so many and they constantly take you by surprise. Tiptoeing will do no good, either. The game knows that it’s unfair, but it laughs in your face, blows you a kiss and taunts you with a very close save point. Yes, that grass looks clear, but take a step and OH GOD SPIKES IN THE FLOOR. Ooh, you can use that vase to teleport. To where? A PLACE WITH SPIKES IN THE FLOOR. Not to mention the killer flowers, big enemies you can’t kill because Eryi is too tiny, hidden enemies and giant weights falling from anywhere.
The first few times, it’s funny. The following ten times, maybe not so much. And the rest of the time, it’s the kind of frustrating that invents new swear words, curses the developers and all their brethren and raises blood pressure to unhealthy amounts. But she’s cute, right? The world doesn’t look that mean, right?
With infinite lives and the save flags being pretty frequent although by no means less difficult to reach, the game encourages that kind of constant, teeth-gnashing gameplay. Why would you do this yourself? Because you like the pain, that’s why. Because the game is pretty funny, that’s why. Oh and because Eryi is sweet enough that you can’t really bear to tell her that she’s probably never going to get her melon back.
But hey, maybe she will! Maybe you’ll have more perseverance and fewer smashed keyboards than me. Good luck~! The makers of the game are rooting for you, it’s true! Otherwise, as they suggest, gift it to someone you hate and break out the popcorn, safe in the knowledge that at least this section of the Japanese doujin game scene is trolling everyone and not just you.