The Dream Thieves: They Come In The Night

In the modern age, privacy is a pretty big deal. I’d say people are getting paranoid about their privacy, but as the old saying goes, you’re only paranoid if they’re not out to get you. With sites getting hacked every day, it’s never been a bigger worry that your personal and private information will find itself in some fat little hacker’s hands. Think Dennis Nedry out of Jurassic Park and you’re hitting the right notes.

With all this going on, it’s no wonder that some people don’t want Kinect in their living room, for a number of reasons. Sure, Microsoft probably won’t spy on you, but what if someone else hacked in and managed it? The CIA, the NSA, or CSA? Imagine yourself, sat there in your pants eating Wotsits (again, think Dennis Nedry out of Jurassic Park) while some hacker (Dennis Nedry again) watches and laughs. It’s second on my list of reasons not to buy a Kinect, immediately after the notion that Microsoft could well drop it like a hot rock as soon as it becomes clear that the Xbox One is losing to the PS4. But of course, that would never happen, right?

GTA IV's Cops N Crooks mode
GTA IV’s Cops N Crooks mode

I fear that watching us via Kinect may be the least of our worries, though, after recently seeing a trailer from EA/Visceral Games. I’m worried about telling you this, as it is such a big revelation I’m worried I may be whipped away to some sort of EA Guantanamo for spilling the beans.

You see, I think that EA and Visceral have been stealing my dreams. Crazy, huh? I don’t know how they do it, it’s probably via some sort of Bluetooth, but they’re definitely doing it. As soon as I saw the video for Battlefield Hardline I knew – they’d been inside my dreaming subconscious. There’s simply no other way a games company could have come up with an idea so perfectly suited to me.

Police cars! Explosions! Yes, I'm a child, but I love this sort of thing.
Police cars! Explosions! Yes, I’m a child, but I love this sort of thing.

I’ve been running a GTA night now for six years, and it was all started by a desire to play Cops ‘n’ Crooks, a GTA IV online game mode, with players all working together as a team. In Cops ‘n’ Crooks the premise was simple, one team of crooks have to escape to a boat or helicopter while a second team of better armed cops have to stop them. It was great fun, and I loved the combination of the chaos and the team based gameplay. I’ve been disappointed since launch that the mode didn’t make it into GTA V, as I’d have loved to have seen a refreshed version, or in fact, any mode at all where you could play as a member of Los Santos’ finest.

I don’t know how they do it, it’s probably via some sort of Bluetooth, but they’re definitely doing it.

Over that same period of time, I also got heavily into Battlefield, starting with Bad Company 2, then moving on to Battlefield 3, and most recently, 4. Again, the primary appeal for me with Battlefield was the team based gameplay, and the feeling that you really have to work together to succeed. I’ve struggled through ropey launches, server problems, unfeasibly large patches and all manner of others problems because the core Battlefield experience is such a lot of fun that I’m willing to forgive a lot of crap to get it.

And now, if the trailer is to be believed, I can get those two experiences rolled into one. Madcap police chase action created with that fantastic Battlefield core, and I simply can’t wait to fire into the newly released beta.

Of course, I didn’t need to write this to tell EA that I love the idea, as I went to bed that night and dreamed contented, happy dreams, that I’m sure rated very highly indeed on their magical Bluetooth Dreamometer.



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