Dear Mr Paul W. S. Anderson,
While I like to think that I am a somewhat tolerant person, I have to admit I am concerned. It appears to me that a pattern is forming; one that cannot go without some comment or word of caution.
I am a gamer you see, not occasional or fleeting, but a fully devoted ‘this is for life’ kind of deal gamer; through and through, and always will be. Just because my ‘hobby’ involves the aid of a computer, doesn’t mean that my thoughts or my industry can be toyed with so recklessly, in the way you have done time and time again.
My problem, Mr Anderson, is that you seem to have a penchant for ruining video game based movies, in an epic proportion. Despite their monetary profit (mainly created through people similar to myself who naively trust you to do a good job) it is in fact evident that your movies tend to suck.
I feel it my duty to tell you that just because you tried out a video game for five minutes, doesn’t mean you can release a half thought out movie with the same title and get away with it unnoticed.
Let us go back to Mortal Kombat; I know it was 1995 but it was still a tack-fest. Considering you chose to immortalise in film a game that was renowned for its violence and gore, you still opted to make a ‘15’. Newsflash, Paul, kids that are underage will find even more reason to go and see an ‘18’ rated movie simply because it’s an ‘18’, more so if it’s actually good – you don’t need to dumb it down! Credit where credit is due, it wasn’t as bad as De Souza’s Street Fighter, but that doesn’t make yours a movie marvel!
For the sake of keeping to point, I will swiftly skim past Alien vs. Predator and move promptly onto Resident Evil, where my biggest grudge lies.
You sir, are blasphemous.
If Chris Columbus, Alfonso Cuaron, Mike Newell, and David Yates had done to Harry Potter what you have done to Resident Evil, they would currently be hanging from the gallows at the Tower of London with a lynch mob millions strong beating them to death with broom sticks. Just because your adaptation stems from a game instead of a novel, does not give you the right to reconstruct it entirely but give it the same name.
Your films have little to do with the actual plots that we have played through, and miss their point entirely. As well as making the movie and its sequels the Milla/Alice show (an odd coincidence, considering you’re married to her isn’t it?) you have completely disregarded what made the video games so popular.
Isolation. Umbrella. Survival Horror.
You don’t need to invent a girl, with a string of plot twists that revolve around her, to swoop in and save the world from a zombie apocalypse – that’s what Jill Valentine is for! The fact that you neglected her and Chris Redfield from the start is unforgiveable, as was making them redundant in screen time to said ‘swooping girl’ in comparison.
As your movies have progressed the relation to Resident Evil has become more and more diluted by the scene, and yet the franchise, in all its 28 game glory, has so much depth and substance that your films could have been bursting at their zombie seams.
Having recently watched the trailer for ‘Resident Evil: Afterlife’ I’m somewhat relieved that you seem to have at least picked up Resident Evil 5 and played it for more than 5 minutes; your knowledge of the earlier titles seems to have stretched little further than the back of the case. The presence of the chest implant, even in Claire Redfield could prove to be an interesting twist, and finally after three films you have realised the potential of Albert Wesker to be the ultimate zombie movie villain – well done Mr Anderson, you finally played the original game long enough to realise he was a double crosser eh?
I still haven’t forgiven you for the poor excuse that the Resident Evil films have been on our movie screens, but now that you’re once again set to work with the on/off ‘Castlevania’ movie let me tell you this:
* The protagonist must be a Belmont, and has to be male. Despite her links to Eastern Europe, the home of Dracula – Milla CANNOT play the hero.
* Give the character some kind of whip – but don’t go all Indiana Jones on us.
* Set it in a castle
* Get the script right
* Above all else, actually play the games before you write it!
If you really need any more help there is one other suggestion I can give you.
A film maker by the name of Kevin Tancharoen recently created tidal waves in the movie and gaming universe by directing a short film entitled Mortal Kombat:Rebirth.
YouTube it.
Everything about it is right; the grittyness, the gore, the adaptation of the game, the characters and their backgrounds into a movie plot, all because he knew the games and understood what they meant to the gaming world. My advice to you would be to relinquish all your future directing duties to this man, and others like him who know what it means to put a game on the big screen.
All this from a man that previously directed Fame, and with a budget of only $7,500; it’s amazing what passion can do to motivate you.
If I ever get my lottery win, Mr Anderson, I think you should know that a Resident Evil movie, how it should have been done, will be making its way to an independent film festival near you.
You have been warned.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hy2CGY4c55k[/youtube]
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