Somebody Shoot Me

I want the Stimulus Package map pack. Yes I’m aware that it’s ridiculously over-priced and that not all of the maps are brand new so I’m not saying that I’m definitely gonna fork out for it but, man, I want it. I want the Modern Warfare 2 piss-takingly expensive DLC. I want to play that annoyingly broken, excessively exploited game over and over again until my brain melts.


I hate you, Infinity Ward. I hate you for making a game that I love so much. I hate that I’ve spent near enough eight days playing MW2 only to be nuked by cold-blooded boosters hiding in a dark corner, stabbed by teleporting, lightweight/commando users from halfway across the map after unloading an entire clip into him and n00b-tubed or lagged to death in Groundwar because I cannot party up with my friends in any other playlist without having to mute a whole room of players so I won’t have to endure verbal abuse from sexually frustrated teenagers. Hate. You.

I may need help. I don’t ask for it often but I’m not strong enough to get through this by myself. I’m not sure I’m capable of resisting new killing grounds. I know it’ll drop in price one day in the future, and I know there will still be people playing MW2 when that happens. Many may be abandoning the ranks of MW2 for the excellent Battlefield: Bad Company 2, stating that they’ll never go back to it but it won‘t matter, this is a Call of Duty game – it’s mindless, indulgent carnage. It will be played for a long while to come yet and this pack of five maps, despite costing as much and more as some quality XBLA games, will sell. I can’t bear the thought of being late to the party; I dread getting left behind. If I don’t know a map I am like a lost little lamb. Scrambling around in the dark until knowing the layout becomes second nature. I need to learn them while others are learning them, lost together in unfamiliar territory. It’s one thing having sexually frustrated teenagers ask for pictures of my boobs, but I’ll be damned if I’m giving them the chance to call me a noob!

Shoot me, do it now.







8 responses to “Somebody Shoot Me”

  1. walthall avatar

    yea that makes since. i know im gettin it, just wish they would hurry up! im gettin sleepy

  2. Markatansky avatar

    *Mental Note: Boob pictures are still out the question – need to stop asking.* ;D

    I’m probably not going to get it at all, Bad Company 2 has stolen my heart with it’s fluffy teamwork souffle and destruction-coated strawberries.

  3. Simon avatar

    Noobs and boobs.

    Modern Warfare 2.

  4. DelTorroElSorrow avatar

    The way you’re talking it almost sounds like you’re a girl.

  5. UnsocialToaster avatar

    You don’t want it at the moment, nothing but problems its causing!

  6. Laura avatar

    I know, it’s broken! This is brill, it will stop me buying it (til at least later)

  7. The Rook avatar
    The Rook

    I’m not much of a multiplayer gamer, but even if I did play this online, I would refuse to pay such a high peice for the DLC. The game itself was expensive enough. Are we to expect the same from Treyarch when they release the next CoD?

    It may be a huge franchise, but that doesn’t justify taking the piss.

  8. Markatansky avatar

    [sarcasm]I hate it when [fatcats]two companies[/fatcats] release DLC on the same day and you just can’t [thefreeone]decide which one to download[/thefreeone].[/sarcasm]

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