If I Could Escape
Fran Shergold
December 17, 2009
If I could escape I would but, first of all, let me say,
How could you let them kidnap me again and on my birthday.
OK my cake was all pretty but did look a quite odd,
How did you not see those Koopalings on top,
Maybe you should go back to your regular plumbing job.
(Whooo hoooo! Yeeeeh Hoooo!,
Whooo hoooo! Yeeeeh Hoooo!)
If I could escape without Mario I would but, first let me say,
How could he let them kidnap me again and on my birthday.
Yes, my cake was all pretty but something was odd,
How did he not see those Koopalings on top,
Maybe he should go back to his regular plumbing job?
(Chorus) If I could escape, on my own from Super Mario World, I could be Mario’s favourite girl forever,  floaty skirt light as a feather, And I would use the warp pipe to cheat. And that would be sweet, But I’m an easily captured girl I didn’t mean to drag you from castle to castle forever, With a tennis racket I’m a lot better, Or with a Mario Kart accelerator under my feet. (I could defeat, could defeat…)
“I want to get away to our sweet escape
I want to get away, Mario!”
In 1985, you first rescued me from a spiky Dinosaur fate, But more than twenty years later we still haven’t been on a date. Come on, grab your fire flower now – use that warp pipe you’ve found, And come underground to King Koopa’s World 8 impound.
So tell me, why can’t he kidnap Daisy,
He told Bowser Jr that he was my baby, and that’s pretty crazy.
I know the levels aren’t easy, if you’re dragged down by Luigi,
So why don’t you make me some spiked turtle soup, I need you to free me…
(Chorus) If I could escape and have a peaceful and quiet Mushroom world, Toad’s squeaky voice won’t say “Hiiiiiiii” forever, we could gag him up with leather And cook a massive mushroom pizza in Delphino isle volcano heat. And that would be sweet, Although I’m more a pepperoni girl I didn’t mean to keep you hitting creatures with your feet forever, With a basketball I’m a lot better, Or with my parasol I can shield your red hat from sleet. (On the street, on the street.)
But I’ve been shoved in a dungeon again behind a red door,
Why don’t you use the warp whistle to get to world 4,
What the hell do you think a warp whistle is for!!!
(Chorus) So help me escape, it could be Peach and Mazza all on our own, But if you don’t get here quickly, the situation might get prickly, After twenty years Bowser’s starting to look neat. And that could be sweet, Mrs.  Bowser’s a good name for a girl And the queen of the Koopa’s would be captured never, I’d be at home forever, With – oh no!!!  - koopalings all under my feet!!! (Under my feet, under my feet)
“I want to get away to our sweet escape
I want to get away, NOW!!!
MARIO!!!”
(Repeat chorus to fade)
December 17th, 2009 at 10:07 am
:D Awesome!
December 17th, 2009 at 10:10 am
Haha, that was great. I love your illustrations! <3
December 17th, 2009 at 9:27 pm
Yeah, that was great reading. Needed a quick pick me up after the late evenings I’ve been working. Good work on the drawings too.